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Finally!! The little man and I seem to have become friends. A few days back, while I was begging him to sleep at 2 AM, he gave me a lovely smile that made me forget all the sleep deprivation and tiredness. Not the random ones that he directs at the ceiling and curtains or the ones that he gives in half sleep. Yes, he looked into my eyes and gave a smile meant just for me. A milestone indeed!
Having been together for more than two months now, I have learnt his ways better and he has started to recognize me too and shows it in his own little ways. He seems to calm down from his bawls if he hears my voice or if I hold his hand. He even smiles if I look into his cradle and talk to him just after he gets up from slumber. A slightly dimpled cute smile that shows his delight at being attended to even for the small shriek that he gave :)
With proper weight gain, he now feels like a sizable baby and I enjoy picking him up and cuddling him. His gurgles and baby talk, the interest with which he observes things around him and his wide array of expressions are a real treat to hear and watch. The way he pouts before crying is unimaginably cute. That one is my favorite expression (Quite a wicked mom, am I ? ;))
There was a time when I actually wondered if I was ever going to enjoy motherhood. The first one and a half months was a roller coaster ride of stress and worries. I guess it took time to get accustomed to being primarily responsible for someone after so many years of carefree existence. Motherhood does take its time to sink in. All those stories about baby and mom bonding instantly and motherhood feeling heavenly as soon as one catches the first sight of the baby sound quite unbelievable to me. Or maybe it is just that I happen to be different :)
I still do miss the times when work, books and music filled my life. I sometimes long for the couple life with just me and the husband living like good friends, discussing the day's happenings after coming home from work, enjoying dinner watching episodes of 'Everybody loves Raymond' and travelling whenever we felt like it.
But now that the magic between mom and baby has sparked off, I am really beginning to enjoy this phase. Looking forward to write more about this wonderful journey in the baby diaries series!! :)